March 26, 2011

• When it rains, it pours....

  Posted by Stephanie  9:30pm CST  from the apartment  Houston, TX

  Well, it's been a crappy day.  There's just no other way to put it.  Surprisingly, it has very little to do with me--I'm just fine, plugging along, officially halfway through the chemo part of this round.  No, the problems are happening at home, and today at least, it seems like the phrase, "When it rains, it pours" fits pretty well.

  My 93-year old grandfather, who I know I've mentioned from time to time in posts, is in the hospital for the second time in two weeks.  The first time it was for a bad UTI, this time for pneumonia, and though a chest x-ray yesterday showed it was clearing up, he took a turn for the worse during the night.  Weakness, problem keeping his oxygen stats up, shortness of breath, fluid in the lungs....I woke up at about 3:30 to hear mom on the phone with the nurse, learning all this.  What followed was a middle of the night rush to get her plane ticket changed (she was already headed home in a few days since Sammy was coming down for his spring break), throw a suitcase together, and get her to the airport for a 7am flight.  Updates throughout the day have him stable in ICU and resting comfortably, but he's frail, and the doctors think he's suffering not from complications directly related to the pneumonia, but from heart failure.  It's gonna be a rough go, but I'm so thankful mom was able to get home where she was needed.

  Mom leaving early meant we had to juggle Sammy's travel schedule as well, since I'm technically not supposed to be down here on my own.  After 2 1/2 rounds of this regiment, I have yet to experience any mental "loopiness" side effects (which is one of the primary reasons I'm not supposed to drive myself), so, we're not really worried about that, and I drove mom up to the airport this morning.  The other reason for not driving is because I receive those pre-medications that make me drowsy every day with chemo.  That one's a little harder to get around, so Sammy's headed down here first thing tomorrow morning.

  I'm certainly not complaining about having the Samster around a couple of extra days, but he was going to use the first couple days of break before heading down to get some stuff done around the house.  One of those things was laundry, but after starting the washer and coming back later to throw the load in the dryer, he discovered water allllll over the laundry room and spilling into the two small storage rooms next to it (one of which is carpeted).  Greeeat.  He had to pull out the shop vac, empty out those rooms and go to work trying to suck up all that water.  I'm gonna have my dad look at it when he comes to check on the cat--hopefully it's a minor leak or plugged drainage tube.  I'd really hate to have to buy another washer right now!

  So, between things with grandpa, malfunctioning appliances and being alone here for the day with my thoughts, well, it's been a little rough.  Sammy and I are both starting to feel the strain that comes with doing this for the fifth time.....apart, and it sucks.  It's such a different experience for each of us.  No one can ever know what it's like to be a cancer patient unless you've lived it yourself--not even a caregiver or spouse who's been through it with you.  And the stress and toll of a caregiver is completely different--Sammy gets to keep going with work, and be home, but he's there alone, and just like me, his life is on pause.  We spent quite awhile talking about it tonight, and I just wish I could cheer him up.  I'm hoping the week down here will give him a chance to unwind and relax.  I'm sure he's gonna wanna do a post with some thoughts soon.

  Here's to hoping the rest of the weekend is a little brighter!  I'm missing everyone at home--thanks for keeping in touch.

  -Steph–

  • 11:02 pm
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