Posted by Stephanie 9:20pm from the house

I'm sorry I've been absent for two weeks--I've been dealing with more medical adventures.....and not the good kind (wait, is there a good kind of medical adventure?). I'll tell ya, if it's not one thing with me (namely, cancer), then it's gotta be something else. Evidently my body is not content with recovering, or even just 'being'. It's gotta be causing trouble in some form, and two weeks ago, that form was a kidney stone that took me to the ER. They did a CT, which showed a fairly large stone (6mm) in the proximal ureter (not too far from the kidney) and, get this, MULTIPLE other stones in my right kidney (hence the post title). Guess they just felt like hanging out in there. I'm one of those lucky people who's just prone to forming stones. I've got no idea how long they've been there, or if they're going to cause problems in the future, but the doc at the ER was only concerned with the one making trouble at the moment. We got the pain under control, sent me home, and I followed up with my urologist a couple of days later. I hadn't seen him in over two years (the last time I had a stone that caused problems), and since this one had been behaving since leaving the ER, we decided to wait and watch, although he did warn that stones over 5mm don't usually pass on their own.

For the next week and a half, I only had occasional twitches of pain, but got a followup CT scan last Friday to see what the updated status was. I was supposed to get the results from that at an appointment with the doctor tomorrow, but my kidneys decided not to cooperate and wait that long. Instead, I wound up back in the ER Saturday afternoon when the pain returned and became completely unbearable. I tried the pain medication I had at home, but even double doses of Norco and Delaudid didn't touch it. While in the ER, they reviewed the CT I had done the previous day, and to no surprise, the stone hadn't really gone anywhere in two weeks--it was still in there being obnoxious. The ER doctor called my urologist, told him about the pain (and vomiting), and the decision was made to schedule me for surgery the next morning (Sunday). Certainly, in comparison to previous surgeries, having a cystoscopy and ureteroscopy (big terms for going in, breaking up the stone, and putting in a stent) is no big deal, but I still hate the process--check in at the hospital having not eaten since the night before, fill out loads of paperwork, put on one of those lovely gowns and get stabbed for an I.V., then get knocked out and wake up some time later feeling totally out of it and doped up. The stent is quite uncomfortable, and I've been urinating blood for more than two days now, but I shouldn't complain too much, because at least it's taken care of for now. The stent stays in for a week or two, and hopefully during that time it keeps things open enough to allow some of the other trouble children up in my kidney to escape without incident. I gotta say, I'm not real pleased with my body right now--I think it's a lemon and I would like replacement parts, or at least my money back.....but no really, in all seriousness, I'd just like a little bit of time without some major medical event. As one of our band director friends said on Sammy's facebook page, "I vote your wife gets the next 200 years free of any health problems. All in favor?". Thanks, Dave, I concur.

So, anyway, that's been the major events of the last couple of weeks. I did get out to Sammy's mini camp the first couple of days of June to do woodwind sectionals and teach marching basics. Just like riding a bike. Sammy and I have also taken on a lot of projects around the house (closets, garages, etc.) in the hopes of actually having the place in order before our whirlwind of summer travel begins. Which brings me to.....

VEGAS!! We leave early Thursday morning for a long weekend in Las Vegas, and we cannot wait! For those of you who have been following the blog awhile, you'll remember last year about this time was our first trip to Vegas with friends, and right before we left was the whole 'shoulder pain that was really the sign of a giant liver tumor' discovery. As you can imagine, that put quite a damper on our trip last year, since I spent the whole time with my arm in a sling and on pain meds. This time, well, there's the stent I have to deal with, but it's still a way better scenario. Someday maybe we'll actually get to go there without anything plaguing the trip......a girl can dream. Anyway, it's gonna be a great time. Sammy and I's five year wedding anniversary is later this month, so we're celebrating big in Vegas with a dinner at one of the top steakhouses on the strip. We're talking primo Kobe steaks, decadent sides, great wine, and of course dessert. I have no doubt it will be amazing.

I could keep typing, there's certainly plenty to blog about, but I've got to throw in another load of laundry and then get some sleep, since tomorrow will be a crazy day of packing, cleaning and running errands, and I'm not exactly in top form at the moment. We'll make sure to let you all know how the trip goes, and when I get a chance, I'll update on the whole steroid swelling issue (it's still here......though getting better) and our upcoming trip to Houston for a checkup. Have a good night, and a good week. Night all.

--Steph

Posted by Sammy
130pm from Home

I thought it might be fun to take a break from cancer-talk (sort of) and talk about biking. Some people ask my why a bike...why do that to raise money for charity? Why do that when there's other, less body-shattering ways of doing things than riding 100 miles in the summer heat? And why on earth do you parade around Ohio on two wheels in spandex?
Ok first, its lycra, not spandex....lycra, nylon, those retain a little dignity. Spandex sounds like a Richard Simmons/Hair Band wardrobe malfunction and were not going there.

And its not without its dangers. We've all had our share of crashes...Ive had some...interesting ones
-flipped over backward going uphill
-hit a ditch, blew a tire and got thrown over the handlebars...those were both on grass so not as bad as.....
-lost control, caught the pavement, blacked out and got some nice gashes up my side...it was ok though, my head broke my fall....

But really...why a bike? When did this start? How did I go from the kid on training wheels to the guy in full cycling gear riding a road bike up any hill i could find and seeing how fast i could get down the other side?

Think back to your first bike....I can remember mine. It was red with yellow plastic wheels and black tires. It had, as did most of my first few bikes, the foam padding on the front handle bar and on the top tube that ran from the seat to the front of the bike....Im guessing it was "safety padding" for that unfortunate rite of passage every young lad has where your feet come off the pedals and you go onto not the seat.....*shudders*. One day the training wheels came off and that was it, i was hooked. But it was kind of a different time. As kids we biked everywhere. The park, school, each other houses, everywhere.I think we had it in our heads that we really could become the kids from E.T.

 We used to camp every summer down in Ripley at a campround called Chief Loga's Gap...it was a huge valley in the hills with gravel roads and tons of open space. Every morning id be out the door on my bike by 7am riding around before i would start fishing for the day. About that time i got my first bike with multiple gears...it was a Schwinn mountain bike. I rode that thing all the time. It was a step up from the BMX bikes we all had as kids. Those were fun but as you got taller, the bike did not and you didnt want to look like this

Plus the old bmx bikes were basically fixies. Meaning that there was usually no hand brake. The only way to stop was to stop pedaling which then locked up the back wheel....sounds like fun until you REALLY need to stop...then not so much on the fun. Ironically all this time i was riding with exactly NO helmet on. Brilliant. Several years later I would change that and I have it on good authority from some ER workers that it is a good thing I did. I kept riding my new wheels on the dirt and it was a blast. I really did enjoy riding gravel and dirt paths and it didnt matter if it was wet or dry...the big knobby tires would go and so I went. But even as a kid the idea of riding on the road and doing long distances was in my head. I head read about Greg LeMond winning the Tour de France (back before hes current incarnation as a cantakerous, bitter old former-racer) and as I began my days on a bike with actual brakes started to hear sports reports about some guy named Armstrong starting to make a name for himself as a bicycle racer. I had no idea how much influence that guy was going to have on what i was doing.

Posted by Sammy
11-something pm
From home

It is finished. The school year is over. Only 2 days of mini camp for marching band and then I pretty much close up shop, save for running out some fundraiser items every couple weeks. And I enter into that state of mind where Im really not sure what day of the week it is. Should be a good summer. We go for a check up right at the beginning of July for Steph...few days of my tour-de-tex-mex. In mid- June we make a return trip to Las Vegas and Myrtle Beach in July with my fam. Im really excited about that one. I was in college the last time my brother and I were both able to go on vacation at the same time so this is a big deal to me. And baby Austin will be there so thats especially cool. I think I was about his age when mom and dad got their first pictures of me at the beach.

When I think about when I was a kid, things seemed so simpler and I hope that when Austin is my age that he looks back on those years with the same fondness I do. I remember sitting on the beach as a little kid, smelling like sunscreen and zinc, eating raisins covered in sand; trying to feed squirlles with Mamaw; running through Barefoot General Store when that was all that was there....no Barefood Landing, House of Blues, or anything else.
I miss being a little kid. I think thats always why I loved Christmas so much, aside from the obvious what with the Jesus and the presents and all. Just being a kid and Christmas was the green light to be uber-kid. I can remember Andy and I making a map of the house, including the tree, directions of how to get where and a supply list and map to the kitchen, since we knew we would wake up long before daylight. Now keep in mind we lived in a small ranch-style house. The kitched was around the corner from our bedroom. Like literally the refrigeratior with our supply of Mt. Dew and Gatorade was on the other side of our dresser. But map we did.
I remember summers at Lake Manitou. Where I learned to fish. My favorite picture ever of me was taken there. Ill find it and scan it in to post...its a pic of me, about 4 years old, fishing off the front of the boat by myself at probably 630 or 7 in the morning. You could make a postcard out of this thing.

Summer is here and it makes me remember what being a kid was like. No caring about what the economy did, whether the flu was going to get us, and not even knowing what cancer was. I hope Austin has good memories like that and I hope we and all of you make some great new ones this summer. So here's to warmer weather, long days, thunderstorms, leaves on the trees, and vacations. Here's to humidity and running through the sprinkler, and catching lightning bugs. And above all here's to kids going outside and getting to be kids for a while....and here's to not knowing what day it is for the next two months

Till Next time....big post on cycling coming up soon!....Bicycle Boy Part I

Sammy
http://philly09.livestrong.org/sammyminge

Posted by Stephanie 9:20pm from the house

I know I've been very absent from here since leaving Texas. Things have been a little crazy since arriving back home, and everyday I'm wiped and off to bed without having done a post. But, that's still no excuse--I'm just lame. My apologies.

This won't be a long post this evening, as I am once again totally exhausted. I got on my bike tonight for the first time in nearly a year. I wanted to see how it'd feel, whether my heart could handle it, etc., because nothing gets ya back in shape faster than riding. I've been doing FIRM videos (with the beginner modifications) or the elliptical machine at the YMCA at least every other day (I try for every day unless I'm just too dang tired), and they've been kicking my butt, but I knew the bike would be even better if I could handle it. Sammy and I took the bikes down to the trail and rode 7.5 miles. Certainly not the 25-30 mile rides I was easily doing a year ago, but hey, for being just over four weeks off chemo, I'd say that's a pretty good start. It took 18 months before I even attempted the bike after treatment the first time, and even then it was rough, so I'm pretty satisfied with how my physical recovery is going so far.

Speaking of physical recovery.......the swelling. *sigh* I'm happy to report that most of the puffiness in my face is gone. My abdomen, however, is a little (or a LOT) slower to respond. Sammy swears it's getting better, and says I don't notice because I look at myself a bajillion times everyday, but all I know is that my clothes didn't fit when I came home, they still don't fit now, and I hate it. It's been four weeks and two days since I quit the steroids--ENOUGH ALREADY!! Go away!

I don't think there's been a ton of exciting stuff happening to report on. Most of my days involve a little exercise, maybe a grocery run, or paying some bills, and then a lot of cleaning/organizing around the house. We've lived in this house just over four years now, and it's never been organized. We moved into it in the middle of a school year, so there wasn't time then to get it together, and it wasn't long after that when I started to get sick. It's long overdue. We're hoping to have the big projects tackled and taken care of by mid-June. I've got my work cut out for me.

I'd say the hardest part of being home and getting things back to "normal" is actually the mental and emotional adjustment. I started dealing with those difficulties a few weeks before being done with treatment, and they still continue. It doesn't seem like it should be tough--I feel like I should be totally thrilled to be home, and that everything should just fall into place and be hunkey-dorey, but it SO isn't. It's really impossible to explain to anyone that hasn't been through something like this. Even Sammy admits he can't envision what it's like, and he's often at a loss for what to say to help me through it. The first couple weeks that I was home were really bad--I was down in the dumps all the time, upset by the slightest thing and moping around. Sammy and I (and Reba and I) had a long talk about it, and since then I've been trying hard to be more positive. I know it's hard on the people who care about me to see me that way, and I've never been the kind of person to let something keep me down. I'll kick my own butt and get back up and moving, cause I need to. With as much as I've been through in the last three and a half years, it's a wonder I haven't totally cracked, and I'm thinking it might be beneficial for me to actually start seeing a counselor or therapist to help me work through everything that's happened and help me find my place in life again. Don't exactly know how you go about getting something like that started, but I'll look into it.

Anyway, I'll stop babbling about that--it's a complicated issue, and one I'll get into more later, but for now, I'm gonna have a cup of hot tea and go to bed. I'll post again soon--there's lots to chat about. Night all.

--Steph

Posted by Sammy

1145pm from home

We've both been slacking lately at posting and I promise well be getting some more regular updates on here soon. There is a lot coming up in the near future...some trips out of town, marching band stuff, preparation for Philly....and ive got a few riding stories already I need to share.

For now Im just trying to wind the school year down and Steph is getting into a routine here at home. She is doing really well. The puffiness form the steroids is slowly going away and she is back to exercising and slowly recovering.

Like I said we'll get some more updates on here soon...the end of the school year is always hectic for me but Ill stop slacking. For now we hope everyone has a fun, happy and safe Memorail Day weekend!

Sammy

http://philly09.livestrong.org/sammyminge

Posted by Sammy

430 from Home

So May is here and with it comes a ton of things. Including me calling in sick today. Blarg. Woke up this morning completely congested, running a temp, and a bit achy. No clue whats wrong but its lame. All im saying is if one of you students brought swine flu in the band room you fail! Just kidding but really this is no fun. Ive felt wose than whatever I have but it was enough to keep me home from school and wind symphony if that tells you anything. Speaking of swine flu.....

Im all about being informed and prepared but some of what I saw on tv was ridiculous. Officals telling people to stay home unless you are really sick to keep from overwhelming medical staff and to avoid large crowds. What happens the very next day? About few thousand well people show up outside a Mexico City hospital and people in the US with runny noses crowd emergency rooms. Brilliant. Lets literally do EVERYTHING we are NOT supposed to do. But hey, we're humans. We loooove a good panic. Im not saying this flu thing couldnt eventually get rough. It could. And im the King Germaphobe. But trying to hoard Tamiflu at home is just stupid. In fact, thats a pretty good way to create flu strains resistant to anti-viral drugs. Read. Learn science. If you are hoarding drugs, you probably lack the common sense as to when to take them. Either way i started listening to the BBC and following Sanjay Gupta on CNN...i just want the facts....not a statement from the CDC one minute and media "were all gonna die-look at our cool new swine flu graphic" the next. Or see pictures like this

Not really sure what these guys were trying to accomplish. I guess in a flu pandemic you send the Bobbys to billy-club the virus to death.

Anyhow, were winding down the school year. Steph is home which is good. Weve been taking time to finally get the house back in order. Weve been making some good progress. My neighbor complimented me on the yard and front of the house so I guess were getting there. Im still at war with the weeds in the side flower bed but I think their time is about up. With school ending, my cycling is slowly ramping up which Im happy about. I really love being out there as Ive said before. There are some great areas to ride around here with a lot of climbing whicm Im told I am going to need for Philly. But with Steph now home and some time coming my way Im excited to start training a bit harder as well as having time to do things around the house and visit with some friends.

Philly is only 3 1/2 months away. Im looking forward to it but have some distanc to go to meet my fundraising goal. This is how we fight back and Im still looking to raise more money for the LAF. So heres my request. I am asking everyone who reads this blog to consider donating. It does not have to be large amount....even $5 is $5 toward the fight against cancer. This is our chance to pick a fight. Put it in perpsecive. The news has been about flu since april. We should be on top of that and the scientists who do that are. But now think about this. In the month or so since the flu hit the headlines, 30,000 or more have died in this country from cancer (1500 a day). 560,000 die every year, just in the US.

http://philly09.livestrong.org/sammyminge

Fight Back

Livestrong

Sammy

Posted by Stephanie 5:45pm CST from the apartment Houston, TX

I am a sausage. Well, I feel like one at least—one that’s stuffed so full it’s about to bust through it’s casing. That’s about the best way to describe how I feel all the time now with this swelling and puffiness. It really got significantly worse during this last round, and the last week or so has been especially miserable. I had a mini-meltdown over it before church last Sunday when I was home. I tried on every single pair of pants, skirt and dress that I own, and not a one of them fit. Not a single thing. Sammy found me standing in the closet in my bathrobe just staring at a closet full of clothes I couldn’t wear, and when he asked me what was wrong, I just burst into tears and started blabbering about literally not having a thing to put on. Poor guy, I’m sure he felt lost as to what to say or do, so he just hugged me and let me cry.

It’s sad, and terribly depressing. The only bottoms I have that fit are two pairs of sweatpants and one pair of khaki shorts. I really despise the fact that I’m stuck wearing elastic waist everything till this goes away. Does wonders for a girl’s self esteem, let me tell you. I know, I know, it’s not my fault—it’s the chemo, and the steroids, blah, blah, blah—but knowing that doesn’t make me feel any better about it. Dr. Benjamin said on Thursday that now that I’m stopping treatment and the steroids, all the inflammation, bloating and puffiness should be gone within about four weeks. Hallelujah. Till then I think I’ll just shut myself inside the house so I don’t have to go out in public looking like the Sta-Puff Marshmellow Girl.

Been crazy busy around here since learning Thursday that I’m done. Had to notify the church group that we’d be moving out of the apartment, get prescriptions filled at the hospital, fill out a change-of-address form so stuff would get forwarded home, and so on. Now mom and I are working on cleaning and packing up the apartment. We don’t have a ton of stuff here, since we have been taking things we wouldn’t need anymore on each visit home. Then of course there’s the all important matter of eating at our favorite places before we go. We should be done with everything by tonight, and our plan is to leave out from here early tomorrow morning to begin the two-day trip home (for the last time!).

That’s it for now—I’ve got to get back to my dusting marathon. Adios!

--Steph

Posted by Stephanie 10:00pm CST from the apartment Houston, TX

I’m so happy to be able to start this post by saying, I’M A FREE WOMAN!! I’m done, treatment’s over, I got kicked to the curb…….however you want to put it, I got the green light this afternoon from Dr. Benjamin to be finished with treatment. What great news—time to rejoice!!

Let me back up and go through the day. It didn’t look at first as though we’d be celebrating. Dr. Benjamin came into my exam room this afternoon and, after hugging me and noting my substantial puffiness, launched into a spiel about the “couple of options” we had going forward. One of the options was to continue chemo like we were doing and hope the side effects didn’t get worse, and the other involved stopping treatment for a month to let the steroid side effects subside before restarting again.…it took a minute or so for my brain to catch up with his train of thought, at which point, I said, “Hold on, are you saying we’re for sure doing more chemo?”. Oh noes! What happened to possibly being done?! Dr. Benny went on to explain that he thought we should probably give my body a month off to recover from what the steroids were doing (he thinks that everything I’m experiencing aside from the abdominal pain—the puffiness, the tenderness, the fat face, etc.—is all caused by the steroids) and then do at least another couple of rounds. When I asked what his reason was for doing more, he said that if the treatment was keeping my disease at bay, and I was able to tolerate it, then it made sense to continue with it to ensure a better long-term success rate. In fact, he said that if I wasn’t having any side effects at all, and wasn’t taking the steroids, he would without a doubt continue to do more chemo. However, as I picked his brain about what additional chemo would do and why I should have it, he actually started to talk himself out of his initial decision. After reviewing on the spot the total amount of chemo I’ve had in the last ten months, and mulling over what would be more harmful to me—more chemo or continued steroid use—he decided that there wasn’t really a need to do more, and that he could confidently say I could be done with treatment. Although he said he always likes to do as much chemo as possible, he admitted that there’s no way to know whether another two or four or six rounds would do any more good than the six of methotrexate I’ve already had (and the six rounds of other chemo before that). Cancer treatment, especially in a rare, peculiar case like mine, is not an exact science, and despite having scans and bloodwork to study, there’s never a guaranteed way to know what the perfect call is. I was so taken aback by the sudden switch in his decision mid-consultation that I actually got nervous and started backpedaling, saying, “Are you sure? Don’t let something we said change your mind—I’ll do whatever I need to do, whatever’s best for me, even if that means sucking it up and doing more chemo. I mean, the side effects are a pain, but they’re tolerable….” . I rambled on and on, but he assured me over and over again in every way possible that he was certain now would be as good a time as any to be done, and that based on the surgery necrosis rate and the tumor’s response to chemo, he felt confident we’d done all we needed to do. I’m sure I sounded like a broken record, but I wanted to make sure he was stopping because he felt like it was the right thing to do, not because he felt like he had to due to the steroid side effects and issues. He said that while he did have to take those into account (he’s very concerned about long-term negative effects from continued steroid use), that wasn’t the deciding factor. Basically (as if you couldn’t tell yet), mom and I spent 15 minutes going back and forth with him, “Are you sure?” , “Yes, I’m sure.” , “No really, Dr. Benjamin, are you sure?” , “Yes, I’m sure” .

The whole first half of my appointment with him was enough to give anyone a headache, it jumped around so much (and I’m sure I’ve forgotten something), but overall it was obviously a very good visit. He said the scans from last night looked great, and took a minute to explain the vascular malformation found on the last set of scans, seeing as how I hadn’t seen him since the reason for that had been discovered. It’s exactly as his e-mail response a few weeks ago said—their records show that the I.V. contrast used in every scan was injected from the right side, except the one that showed up abnormal—it came from the left. I asked why that would make a difference, and he explained that because the spot was on the left, the contrast dye hit it before it had the chance to enter a major vein and circulate through, so what they saw on the scan was actually a large amount of the dye moving through that tissue. The scan from last night had the injection of contrast from the right, and once again, it appeared dark gray and normal. So yeah, it was really some fluke and nothing to worry about. Yay. Anyway, the rest of my time with him this afternoon centered around what happens next. Obviously I’m done with chemo. He wants to see me again for scans and a checkup down in Houston in two months. No need for bloodwork or anything between now and then—I’m just to keep taking my sodium bicarbonate tablets and potassium as I have been to keep those levels steady. I asked when my CVC line could come out, and he said they’d give me an order to take down to the Infusion Therapy center right away and have it pulled. We asked about my odds for this returning, and he again said he’s very optimistic that we’ve done enough to keep me cancer free for a looong time. Now it’s my job to keep myself as healthy as possible.

After we had finished bombarding him with all our questions, he asked to see how much hair I had (quite a bit, I must say) and then proceeded to, as he says, “pet my head”. Then one more hug before he took off, and mom and I were left to try and absorb everything that had just happened. I must admit, it was kinda anti-climactic. I mean, I knew there wouldn’t be some big definitive, “YOU”RE DONE!” moment with balloons and confetti and crying, joyous people, but even knowing that, I felt a little lost as I stood in the exam room. It’s like, “What do I do know?”. Technically, I know what to do—pack up, head home, try to get back to some semblance of normal life, but it’s just not that simple. For the past 10 months, and most of the last three and a half years, being a full-time cancer patient is all I’ve done. It’s what becomes your norm, and you get so comfortable doing that that it’s the return to regular life that seems scary and difficult and overwhelming. My thoughts about it are numerous and complicated and I’m definitely too tired to get into them tonight, but I’m sure many of my posts for the next several months will deal largely with those issues now that the bulk of the physical battle is over.

So, here I sit in the apartment, CVC line out (I can shower like a normal human being again….well, starting tomorrow anyway….it’s the little things like that that are so exciting) and once again done with treatment. I’m ecstatic, and thankful, and looking forward to coming home once and for all. Mom and I had a huge tex-mex dinner to celebrate, and I’m still full three hours later. It’ll take a couple of days for us to clean and pack up the apartment, plus there’s a couple of restaurants and places we want to visit before we head home, but it’s looking right now like we’ll leave first thing on Sunday morning for the drive home. Seems crazy, since we just got back down here! Anyway, enough of my rambling—I’m tired and should get some sleep. It’s been a draining day. Goodnight all.

--Steph

Posted by Stephanie 7:25am from the house

So, mom and I are home in Ohio. I know, I know, we're impossible to keep up with--everyone keeps telling me that. I wish I could say we were back for good, but sadly, not yet. I was originally supposed to see Dr. Benjamin last Thursday, the 23rd, for the big news about whether I was being turned loose for good. However, because this last chemo treatment was postponed several days due to my platelets, they also pushed back my appointment with him so that we would have a more accurate set of blood counts to go on at the two week cycle mark as he makes his decision. I now don't see him until this Thursday, the 30th, with abdominal and chest CTs happening Wednesday evening. A couple of weeks ago when I saw his physician's assistant, she said he wouldn't want to repeat the scans from last month, but they showed up on my schedule, so evidently he changed his mind. I'm actually quite glad about that--certainly makes me feel better to know he'll have the most updated information about that vascular malformation that appeared abnormal last time, plus another look at everything else. Without all that, making a decision, to me anyway, would seem rather arbitrary. Of course, how my immune system and I are tolerating the treatments factors into that as well. I continue to have significant issues with the inflammation/swelling issues, puffy steroid face, plus things like minor nosebleeds, trouble sleeping, etc. Nothing new, just more of the same that keeps getting a little worse each round. Personally, I think my body's screaming pretty loud and clear, "I'm done, thank you, I've had enough!". We'll see what Dr. Benny has to say--never can tell with him.

Mom and I found out about my appointment being pushed back over the weekend following my chemo treatment, so our decision to come home was, as usual, last minute. I had totally planned to just be there until the appointment with Dr. B (and then hopefully come home for good), but with the change in schedule, we would've been hanging out down there for about 10 days with absolutely nothing to due. So, as soon as I cleared the methotrexate early last week, we hopped in the car and headed back to Ohio. Got home on Wednesday evening, just in time for the weather to get really nice here. I'm totally used to the temperatures, but 80 degrees here and 80 degrees in Houston feels and looks totally different. I much prefer spring time here--the new buds on the flowers and trees, the cool breeze, all that good stuff. I haven't done much of anything since I've been home--some cooking and baking (Sammy and I grilled out this weekend, too, which was awesome), some laundry and cleaning, had a nearly four hour breakfast with Reba (a new record for us), got to go to church, and saw Sammy play in the community band concert yesterday afternoon. All low-key things, which is fine by me. I've also been to the YMCA twice and spent about 20 minutes each time going verrrry slowly on the treadmill or elliptical machine. Mom and I try to walk at least a mile every day in Houston, but I think it's good to do something a little more intense now and then. There is a workout room at the apartment complex, but most of the time it's either too busy or the machines I would use are broken. I'm determined to get myself physically rehabbed and back in shape much quicker this time around. After I came home from treatment the first time, I had the chest surgery recovery still hanging over me, plus the major cardiac issues, so it took waaay longer to even start a recovery program. Anyway, I shall be buff and tuff (well, at least a little, hopefully) sooner this time. That's my goal!

So much else to talk about, but a quick update is all there's time for right now. I'm supposed to head to central office for Middletown City Schools and sign my contract to return in the fall. That's right, that's the plan. Now, whether I'll be totally physically or mentally and internally ready to do that still remains to be seen, but I had to make a decision, and well, in this economy and our current situation, there's not much of a choice. Anyway, that's a whole other mess of stuff I'm not gonna get into right now. After that and a couple more errands, I've gotta pack up--mom and I start our drive back tomorrow. Oof. I'll update sooner next time, I promise. Hope everyone is doing well.

--Steph

Posted by Sammy

1045pm from Home

So cancer is a heavy subject and every now and then we need to talk about something else. Its how we keep sane during treatment. Just letting random thoughts out to play. Many of these come at odd times to me. People often ask if I write this stuff down prior or really ponder it and the answer, in short, is not really. Most thoughts come when im riding. Its my best chance to unplug from the rest of the world. I really do enjoy it. When Im driving in me car i notice things as i drive by but when im riding I really SEE things...from people to the road underneath...when I get away from cars it can get crazy quiet at times. And I can smell whats around me....sometimes this is a good thing....grills, campfires, even restaraunts. Sometimes its not...like skunks. Weve all smelled them in the car going 60mph....now imagine you have no car to sheild you and youre waaaay closer to the skunk....you get the picture. Anyway, on with the show.....

I was watching the news and saw the teaparties. Now were not going to get into whether those were good, bad or somewhere in between....were not here to debate that. It did however turn my attention to a problem that we must address and without delay.....we, as Americans must do something to improve our rally chants and mob mentality! I watched the news coverage and every crowed was chanting USA! USA!. Now pause....I love our country....Im all for cheering its name when Michael Phelps is making the worlds swimmer's look like Nemo out there. But it was basically us chanting our own name at ourselves. It would be like going into your bosse's office and chanting your own name to prove your point. We do it at every sporting event....even when we're losing. Have you ever watched soccer? Now MLS is making some strides with their hooligans....im hearing drums and songs and seeing flags...but look to our neighbors to the south, say in Brazil. Wow. That is some chanting. The dont shut up for the entire game. And I dont think they repeat either....not to mention practically bringing a 20 piece band to make noise. and play. The closes to that we have come is college football....but that is really pretty neat and tidy....no real conversation between the two sides. No dialouge. No mob-love. To find that we have to look accross the pond. To our friends the British. England has raised chanting and crowd communication to an art form. I give you two shining examples.

1. British Parliament. If you have never watched it, you really should. Im suprised they dont just hit each other. They make congress look like a bunch of sissies.

2. The grandaddy here is the fans of the English National Team....specifically when they played Germany.....and the entire english side, in unison proceeded to sing "If your country won the war stand up" and then rise to their feet. Brilliant.

See? Soccer fans in Europe...threw fireworks....on the field...see how that gets the point accross? Ok me neither but it looks cool.

Im not saying dont have a tea party or a pepsi party or a wine and cheese party. Have a tailgate party on capitol hill...I dont care. Have whatever kind of party you want. Protest peacfully as you please....its your right. But for the sake of the viewers at home, lets get some chants that get the slogan across.

Wrestling fans get their point accross by throwing chairs into the ring? They are saying "We like chairs...use chairs!" Actually I think they also buried the wrestlers under said chairs, so maybe not the most effective stragegy.

Now on to children. No not students....little kids. The ones on the bike trail. Can't we get them to stay still. Ive seen waaaaay more kids running accross the trail this year than in the past. I really want to warn the parents to keep them on a leash or something. Im pretty good about slowing down but those critters are fast. I really dont want to hit a kid by accident....that would be bad. I know how much it hurts me if i go down....and please if theyre riding a bike put a helmet on them. It really might save their life...no joke.

Finally got my sorry self back to church this past weekend. I like it there. Actually I feel very lucky and blessed. Our church has been so supportive through all this cancer stuff and we have two great pastors who really know their stuff.

Thinking of riding Peletonia. Google it....could be interesting. Or painful.

Ok im out of ideas....Im off to bed. Back to real posting tomorrow.

Sammy